THE GITMO GRAMMIES

Part 2

Today’s tyrants, terrorists, and headcases have toughened up. Gone are the days when Motown, acid rock, and/or country western were sufficient to make them see reason. Now, according to Reprieve, the British watchdog group, stronger medicine is required: “F--k Your God" by Deicide, REM’s “Shiny Happy People,” and Barney’s "I Love You" theme are today’s top attitude adjusters.

         Suzanne G. Cusick, NYU music terror specialist at NYU, notes that it’s not so much melody as volume and relentlessness that “breaks down subjectivity” and “simply prevents people from thinking."

         Which brings us at last to the fundamental question: Is this torture?

         Amnesty International says yes. The United States 361st Psychological Operations Company says no.

         Donald Rumsfeld is with the 361st. Just before Bush’s Secretary of Defense was driven from office in 2006, he approved the Pentagon’s purchase of 50,000 copies of Paris Hilton’s debut album to use on Anbar insurgents in Iraq. 

         Israel too is a believer in the power of song. In 1998 its Supreme Court refused to outlaw it in interrogations.

         In fact, the Hebrews were the first to weaponize music. The time: 1550 B.C. The venue: Jericho. Moses’ general, Joshua, brought down the walls of the West Bank fortress after his seven priests blasted their ram’s horn trumpets for six days straight. Then, on the seventh, his army of 603,550 added the We Are the World vocal -- “the great shout.”

         Jericho was like a Hebrew Woodstock, but bigger. Though bands were unplugged in those days, this trumpeting and thunderous chorus from a half-million strong would have drowned out Metallica at the Astrodome. The Zionist anthem not only crumbled the city walls but left the Palestinians inside -- like their unfortunate son, Ruhal Ahmed, the Gitmo POW – wondering what in God’s name was going down.

         So, in the long and ornate history of torture, music is not a new recruit. The Taliban has banned all forms of it. But, acknowledging Joshua’s command performance at the Jericho Philharmonic, they worship him as a prophet.

         Finally, as we tire of casualties in the Holy Land, one wonders if there is not a simple bloodless solution: evacuate our recruits, surrender their iPods to the villagers, and drive the Jihadists back into the mountains with drones broadcasting Dylan’s new holiday album, “Christmas in the Heart.”